After the last few days on the road; the fun of racking servers and a stressful meeting all that’s really left to do is go to bed - even at this early hour ….

Laters.

Posted by Mark at 9:07 PM | Permalink

It’s that time again …

Head on over to the Bloggies to vote.

There’s some excellent blogs and some talented people represented here this year and, in no particular order, I’d recommend :

• Girl with a One Track Mind
• Dooce
• Daily Dose of Imagery
• Boing Boing
• Stuck in Customs
• Going Underground

Next time I start a blog I seriously need a better name for it ….

Posted by Mark at 10:18 PM | Permalink

I’ve finally given in and got an MP3 player.

After wondering for ages if I needed one the backlog of podcasts that I have to listen to and my attempts to get out once a day for walk finally convinced me.

Not needing to carry around a life’s collection of CDs and assorted MP3s I plumped for cheap device, simple to use and with the advantage that I could record onto it.

I had visions of travelling, listening to some music on a beach and recording sounds from markets and musicians to podcast myself.

So, back from PC World I came armed with the Matsui MAT110MR. I plugged it into the PC and downloaded a few podcasts, wandered around the house and listened happily to them.

Back I went to load some music and more podcasts and that is where the fun started. Either the device sulks and refuses to appear or it appears, needs formatting, allows you to copy to it then refuses to restart when removed from the PC.

After trying for over an hour (and listening to some of the backlog of podcasts) I give up and turn to Google where I discover that this sort of behaviour seems to be a “feature” of this little device.

A sense a trip to PC World is due …

Posted by Mark at 9:29 PM | Permalink

It seems to me like I have known some of their names for ever.

I can’t remember what day of the week it was on when “the radio” was my Mums old Roberts radio (powered by batteries only slightly smaller than a housebrick) but it seems to have formed part of my radio listening and, with the demise of Letter from America, is the place I turn to when I want to listen to how words should be used.

It was no surprise to me that I came out from Stanfords bookshop in Covent Garden with an anthology of fifty years of writings from the programme. Not just a travel book From Our Own Correspondent records history and the world as it changes. From the major moments (like 9/11) to small sketches observing life on a Russian train or in an Indian bookshop From Our Own Correspondent

Most poignant to me was the report from Frank Gardener, filed the day before he was shot and his cameraman Simon Cumbers killed.

So, if you want to join me and get to know Kate Adie, Emma Jane Kirby, Tim Llewellyn and Daniel Lak visit the BBC FOOC site and listen to the show …

Posted by Mark at 9:28 PM | Permalink

The last thing I expected was snails.

Thoughtfully they were offered warm with bacon but even that concession didn’t encourage K or me into the warmth. After a morning wandering around the Royal Academy looking at the Chola bronzes of South India we both needed something more substantial and palatable.

I’d wanted to try the Anchor and Hope for a while now and I’d read several good reviews about it but when the moment came it was time to turn to the South Bank, the Riveria and steak and chips : comfort food after the excess of last night.

Posted by Mark at 8:40 PM | Permalink

It was only the other week that I suggested to Martin that we get together with Johnny for a farewell drink. “There will be more than one”, was his reply and tonight was the first of many.

It always surprises me that we don’t get together more often, he only lives around the corner from us but sometimes that’s the way things work out.

So, armed with beer and wine (and after saying goodbye to a rather forlorn Richard who was missing Boys Night) we headed down the road to his house to catch up on news (seems that everyone has been to the new Caribbean shop in the road and even sampled the goat meat on sale there); learn about some of the shadier pubs in the area (amazing what you can see for £1 apparently); eat dolmas and salami; drink wine, beer and gin and squirm as Kate told us what she had sewn up on the fourteen hour shift at the hospital which she had just returned from.

I wonder what the next farewell will bring …..

Posted by Mark at 11:46 PM | Permalink

It’s not really about Jade and what she said ,or her mum, or even stock cubes.

The real issue (and the thing which should alarm us) is the fact that all these years into this Labour governments tenure the real problem that Big Brother has brought into sharp focus is education, eduction, education.

We fail to teach people to set goals, dream and aspire to real success and, instead, praise the celebrity of a failed beauty queen, a singer from a manufactured “band” and a previous winner who rose from nowhere.

We leave people so poorly educated that they have no understanding of other cultures.

We have people who don’t know what the word embryo means.

We have people whose idea of acceptable behavior and how you present yourself in front of others falls very short of the mark.

If we learn one thing from this programme it should be that we need to step up to the mark and deliver on those promises Mr Blair.

Posted by Mark at 7:35 PM | Permalink

Rather amazingly there’s a scheme afoot (in fact rather advanced) to destroy forever the character of one of London’s oldest markets, Borough Market at Bankside.

Twenty three of the historic buildings in this area are due to be demolished for what seems to be a senseless scheme which has a viable alternative.

For more information and to sign the petition head over to Save the Borough Market Area Campaign.

Hat tip to Londonist and Noel Lynch at The Green Room for publicising this.

Posted by Mark at 7:06 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

I have far too much “stuff”.

I wander from room to room and wonder how I came to accumulate all these things. Yesterday I watched Jason and Chris move out of the road, a rather worrying sight as the lorry they hired had to head down the road “the wrong way” before it reversed, later in the day, nervously between the parked cars back to the main road.

Would I need that size of lorry if I moved ? Would I need a larger one ? Just why do I need so much of this stuff ?

So, this year will be the year of The War On Clutter the result of which, hopefully, will mean that less is actually more.

Posted by Mark at 7:02 PM | Permalink

So, according to Dr Cliff Arnall, a psychologist with a taste for self-publicity.

“His formula, taking in six factors - weather, debt, time since Christmas, time until pay day, low motivation and failure to keep new year resolutions - has been wheeled out for the past few years to calculate the most depressing day of the year. And since today is that day, wipe that smile off your face and remove that spring from your step.”

Guardian Unlimited : Is today the worst day of the year?

Despite the fact that today is supposed to be worst day of the year for me it’s not been too bad. OK I didn’t sleep that well and when I did it was full of a very odd dreams where I was underground being squeezed by rocks (note to self to check for a good Freudian dream site) and I have given up on one of the issues at work but overall it’s not been too bad.

If today has been too much then head over to Beat Blue Monday and help raise some money for The Samaritans.

Posted by Mark at 9:57 PM | Permalink

“There’s a butterfly out here”, said K, standing at the kitchen door.

Later we passed not quite a host of golden daffodils but a verge full, their open heads nodding in the sun.

More and more I get the feeling that things just aren’t “right” with the weather and perhaps even I need to do my bit to stop things getting worse.

Posted by Mark at 8:23 PM | Permalink

Sitting inside the restaurant I look out through the window.

The sun is back today - direct and harsh, the white light forming halos behind people’s hair as they walk outside moving from shop to shop.

My hand reaches down to my jacket as we wait for the pizzas to arrive. Car keys and mobile phone.

The place we are eating in has two sets of doors protecting those inside from the cold blowing down the street.

My mind wanders back to the last time in New York where every restaurant seemed to have these double doors or a thick curtain to stop diners sitting in draughts.

I watch the people walk by outside and my hand searches in the pocket for the camera that isn’t there.

Posted by Mark at 8:06 PM | Permalink

The whole week has been stormy. The weather and, inevitably these days, work has been far from clement.

It’s Friday at last and all I want to do is plan how to best use the weekend ahead, spend some time with Martin and Richard. Oh and drink a little beer and, perhaps, some port.

Posted by Mark at 7:48 PM | Permalink

Something just isn’t “right”….

Work is more or less the same (with all it’s associated ups and downs), life is more or less the same. Nevertheless, something isn’t right.

Maybe it’s the weather : one grey day stretching into another. Rain. Wind.

Perhaps it’s wanting to do things and struggling to find the “right” time to do them.

I don’t seem to be able to get myself into gear to do anything that I want to. I seem to be cruising from day to day, putting things I should be doing to one side.

At least it’s almost the end of the week. Perhaps this weekend I can restart my enthusiasm.

Posted by Mark at 10:11 PM | Permalink

“Champions aren’t made in gyms, champions are made from something they have deep inside them - a desire, a dream, a vision. They have to have last-minute stamina, they have to be a little faster, they have to have the skill and the will. But the will must be stronger than the skill.”

“ I’m so fast that last night I turned off the light switch in my hotel room and got into bed before the room was dark.”

Muhammad Ali : 65 today

Posted by Mark at 8:56 PM | Permalink

I am being surveyed, or rather, I am part of a survey.

In a moment of weakness last Saturday I agreed to participate in The National Radio Listening Survey. So, armed with my booklet I am now recording what, when, how and where I listen to the radio.

Rather surprisingly whilst the survey covers AM/FM radio, DAB, Digital TV and the Internet it doesn’t cover podcasted shows or the BBCs Listen Again feature.

Posted by Mark at 7:54 PM | Permalink

I hate using flash for photography.

I’d much rather struggle to get a picture in the gloom than flood the scene with cold, harsh light. But, there are times you need to use it. Only recently did I get a flashgun (and only then a second hand one) to use at Amanda’s wedding. It served the purpose but I can’t say I was happy using it.

Over the last few days I have trying to make sense of all the settings on the flashgun and the camera and at last I think I have it cracked. Reasonable colour, no nasty shadows, good shutter speeds and warmth in the tones.

Now all I need to do is remember what it is until the next time I need to use it …

Posted by Mark at 8:48 PM | Permalink

“Do you want to go out for a walk …?”

Silence echoes between Richard and Joanne and me. They sit and stare at the TV screen.

“It’s sunny out”.

Silence again

“We’re going to have ice cream …”

Only then is the silence broken.

So, that’s how we came to walk into the town then, armed with cones of Ben and Jerry’s, we went to the river to play Pooh Sticks and watch the ducks …

Posted by Mark at 9:25 PM | Permalink

The year is divided into two : the front of the house months and the back of the house months.

That’s, I’m sure, how next door’s cat sees it. For the Winter part of the year she sits either on the gas meter box at the front of my house or, on cold and windy nights, she sleeps in the porch forcing me to remember she could be there before I put the key in the door and accidentally step on her.

Summer is the time for to sleep in the garden or on the patio table or, normally when I’m asleep to the radio, on me making me start as she leaps up onto my lap.

Only rarely does she stray, warily, into the house but tonight was one of them to see what’s behind the sofa and watch the flames in the fire …

Posted by Mark at 11:31 PM | Permalink

I’m almost close to blacking my other eye.

No, I haven’t taken up boxing as a New Year’s resolution. It’s a sign that I’m getting, slowly, to the end of this project.

Above my desk on a shelf I have a Daruma doll. These hollow, armless and legless dolls are modelled after Bodhidharma, an Indian sage who lived sometime in the fifth or sixth century AD.

Bodhidharma was credited with the introduction of Zen into China during his travels. At this time it was called Chan Buddhism, only later being referred to by its’ more familiar name.

The best known legend about this person relates to how he attained enlightenment by meditating in a cave for seven (or nine) years without blinking or moving his eyes. As a result of this his arms and legs atrophied, shriveled up, and fell off. One day whilst meditating he fell asleep and in his anger he cut off his eyelids which fell to the ground and turned into China’s first green tea plants.

Back when this project was going really badly I took out this doll and coloured in one of the eyes. It’s been sitting watching me every day that I work at this desk, it’s one black eye staring at me accusingly, asking “When will I see again ? When will you finish this ?” reminding me why we are doing this and what we need to do to complete this.

Now it feels like it’s close. We are in the finale stages of the plan and most of my time is spent on the preparations to actually do something rather than produce documents or make preparations.

As I turn the light out I see the one white eye in the darkness …

Posted by Mark at 7:38 PM | Permalink

Imagine receiving this email from a person who you have never met or communicated with :

“We intend to publish a prominent news story in this weekend’s paper, revealing your identity

We know what you do at work, we have your birth certificate and educational details.

We will tell the world where you live, your age. In addition we have the same detail on your mother and will publish these as well.”

That’s what happened to Abby Lee, the writer of Girl With A One Track Mind. She recently published the summary of the email from Nicholas Hellen, who along with Anna Mikhailova, decided that it was more in the public interest for us to all know the name of an anonymous blogger than allow this person some basic rights.

It’s a matter I’ve written about before here but this evening two things caught my eye about this.

The first was the appearance of Kelvin MacKenzie on tonight’s Question Time. I found his statement that he wasn’t sorry for his coverage of the Hillsborough disaster amazing. Unlike his reported statement in The Guardian :

“The Daily Post claims a source told them Mr MacKenzie had said: “All I did wrong was tell the truth.”

The source also alleged Mr MacKenzie said: “I went on The World at One the next day and apologised. I only did that because Rupert Murdoch told me to. I wasn’t sorry then and I’m not sorry now because we told the truth.””

Media Guardian : MacKenzie ‘reignites Hillsborough row’

Tonight MacKenzie seemed a little unsure about the voracity of some of the more lurid details that he has published. Whilst he said he was forced to apologise by Rupert Murdoch he is now unclear that fans urinated on one another or that the pick-pocketed the dead.

Browsing through my Google subscriptions I came across this item from Zinnia at Real E Fun which has an excellent discussion of Hellen’s attitude to standards of journalism. She also makes the point that The Girl’s identity wasn’t known a long time before her recent book (available here at Amazon) so the main premis of his argument is somewhat flawed.

Add to that the fact that The Times managed to preserve the identity of the author of The Policeman’s Blog in this article as Zennia points out.

I really do wonder what has happened to standards of journalism in this country. Perhaps William Butler Yeats was right :

“I hate journalists. There is nothing in them but tittering jeering emptiness. They have all made what Dante calls the Great Refusal… . The shallowest people on the ridge of the earth.”

Posted by Mark at 11:58 PM | Permalink

Everyone needs some escapism and mine, tonight, was Casino Royale.

I’ll avoid the obvious 007 in 2007 lines, this is a return to the Bond of Fleming’s books. A patriotic, charming, cold-hearted killing machine. There seems to have been a trend of late to reboot the stories of heroes and villains (à la Batman Begins) and this rework of the franchise takes us back, albeit briefly, to the days before the “00”.

We see Bond before the suaveness set in. Uncomfortable in his clothes until the last scenes (where he appears in a rework of the grey suit worn by Sean Connery in Goldfinger) we watch the development of a character from novice to swine.

It’s a Bond without the frequent sexual conquests and a book with the classic Fleming line “The bitch is dead”.

Fleming once described his books as being aimed at “somewhere between the solar plexus and, well, the upper thigh” This was the most forceful of kicks and I walked out shaken and stirred.

Posted by Mark at 11:18 PM | Permalink

I’ve been fortunate in my life. I’ve only had to call an ambulance once.

Admittedly it was probably one of the worst times in my life but that was due to what was happening and not the response. I know they arrived, I’m not sure how long it took, just that I was relieved to see them. By that time it was a lost cause and I was in a real state. They did what they had to and left and, even today some twenty years on, I still feel a pang of guilt that I didn’t find the time to thank them for just being there.

Except of course when it goes wrong. That’s something Tom Reynolds wrote about today over at Random Acts of Reality :

So, within eight minutes a solo paramedic arrived and nine minutes later there was an ambulance, so the maximum time the patient waited was seventeen minutes. Without knowing the circumstances I would imagine that even if a crew had been sent from Edmonton station they would have shaved only three or four minutes off that time.

The crews on the meal break wouldn’t have even known that there was a call, Control are under orders not to disturb crews except in the last 10 minutes of the break.

Here is the thing - The press love this story because it points blame at the crews, our management or even EU legislation. Here is the story that you don’t hear every day, but would be much more common.

‘Man dies waiting for ambulance because they were all out dealing with idiots who call up for a stubbed toe that happened two days ago’

Just why are meal breaks so contentious ? Reynolds explains :

Due to the budget pressures we have been put under recently there was essentially no overtime available. While we are supposedly fully manned it still meant that there were plenty of ambulances unstaffed. This situation was brought about by the government cutting our money, all at the risk of patient care.

When we have to provide the government with our response time figures we’ll flood the area with ambulances so that we can make it in a ‘big push’. Budget be damned. It used to be if we didn’t make the target then our budget would be cut - now they cut it regardless of us making our targets.

And so we flip-flop, from saving money to providing more ambulances and back again. Our management are on the government leash and are being pulled in two directions.

This may explain why two crews were put on break at once - because management are under pressure from the government to save money wherever possible they are trying to get us our full breaks (in limited time windows) because we can’t afford the £10 for an interrupted break.

The emergency services are a little like insurance. We all contribute to them and we all expect the cover that our money buys. Like water and electricity we expect an ambulance on tap. But, given the strictures of any government at the moment, we need to take care of this resource. We need to learn when to expect it and what to expect it for. If we continue to call the ambulance for every minor injury or drunken episode then we stretch this resource even thinner.

But one day you may need them. Then, like me (and also like me probably not consciously) you will expect them to appear on time (not stuck behind some idiot driver who took an age to get out of the way), fit, healthy, motivated and fed.

I wouldn’t want to do this job : I’m glad that other people do. Lunch isn’t for wimps.

Posted by Mark at 8:46 PM | Permalink

So, after a few days of madness things are almost back to where we started before Christmas.

I suppose you need to put up with these things, just like you need to get used to and accept change, but it’s been, overall, an unsettling experience.

Let’s hope from now we can move on…

Posted by Mark at 7:37 PM | Permalink

After the rain of yesterday the DIY activities were postponed until today.

I managed to get K’s gate fixed and her gutter cleared before the rain started again and we headed off for Sunday lunch and a long, leisurely, laughter filled afternoon.

Posted by Mark at 10:05 PM | Permalink

With two new cookery books (each with 101 recipes) and a steamer amongst her presents K started cooking tonight.

So, poached salmon, broccoli and pasta (cooked very successfully) tonight and I got to sit down with my feet up AND enjoy home cooking all in the same night.

Posted by Mark at 11:52 PM | Permalink

So, day one back and job changes; day two and more confusion; day three and it seems it’s back to where we started out with more or less the same role as I had before Christmas.

There’s a Spanish proverb which says, “A bad thing never dies” so to celebrate this piece of wisdom K and I went out to eat tapas tonight.

Hasta luego.

Posted by Mark at 11:12 PM | Permalink

There’s a lot I could say about today but as I wandered back through the items I’d saved in my Google Reader feed I came across this from Mena Trott one of the founders of Six Apart :

“Trott has an interesting golden rule that she would like to see bloggers adopt. “If you aren’t going to say something directly to someone’s face, than don’t use online as an opportunity to say it,” she says. “It is this sense of bravery that people get when they are anonymous that gives the blogosphere a bad reputation.””

Times Online - Blogosphere 2.0: civility strikes back

So perhaps it’s better I leave things for today except to pass on this thought from Arthur Miller :

“Betrayal is the only truth that sticks”

Posted by Mark at 6:05 PM | Permalink

At this time yesterday I was driving back from a day at the beach.

Surprisingly warm and sunny for so early in a new year it was almost deserted but that suited me fine. I’d taken a camera and took a few pictures but I really wanted to walk. For miles.

Perhaps subconsciously I was walking away from work. Today, back at my desk, I wanted to.

For some time now things haven’t been “right” but they were manageable or at least acceptable. A role of sorts which played to some of my strengths and had the advantage of working with people I respected and got on with.

I was a little surprised, therefore, to find that yet again the role has changed and, once more, no one has given any thought to what I will actually be doing.

I’ve spent the day catching up on email and unpicking what I was doing from my calender. The holes that are left will need to be filled and I guess that’s what will take the rest of the week. Finding something else to do, both here and outside of this company.

Posted by Mark at 6:37 PM | Permalink

Ten years ago I was probably settling down to watch This Life.

I was still in this house but married then. About to change jobs from a very nichè, traditional manufacturing company where I’d spent time sorting out an MRP project that was stuck in the mire of a supplier out of their depth through to working on a rollout of PCs and email. The world of finance and insurance lay before me and I was busy buying new suits and shirts for meetings in “The City”.

I rarely picked up a camera in those days. Somewhere along the line I’d stopped taking pictures except for those big family get togethers. I still have a box full of pictures of people opening presents. One set of prints blurs into another with nothing to identify one year from another.

Holidays tended to be family events as well as we went on holiday with Karen and her then husband. The Lakes or Cornwall was probably as far as we went. As a couple we went to France but any thought of further afield was never welcomed or taken up.

Like the camera the saxophone and music was given up as well. The days of leaving at Saturday lunchtime to travel to some place in the country for a wedding or a birthday had taken their toll and gradually I did it less and less. I was probably even listening less. The nights at the Concord Club, or in the musician’s bar were long behind me.

I guess it wasn’t a bad life, perhaps just rather in a rut. Like someone in a day dream I didn’t know what would happen to me in a few years and the impacts and changes that it would all have - the hell and pain of watching that life, and my marriage, dissolve before my eyes.

In ten years a lot has changed. I rarely look back. But, tonight I just want to settle down with a glass of wine and remember those days and see if Miles, Milly, Egg, Anna and Warren have fared as well as I think I have….

Posted by Mark at 8:23 PM | Permalink

“I think I have died”

“I need to lay on the floor”

“Im off the grog all week”

“I am starting to think drinking again is the only way to get through this pain !!”

“Why were you singing High On A Hill Stood a Lonely Goat Herd ?”

Needless to say it was a good night - or what we can remember of it ..

Posted by Mark at 7:56 PM | Permalink