I was sitting in the front room feeling very satisfied with the fact that I had a new washing machine and a fixed cooker when I heard the sound of water rather louder than I’d expect with a new kitchen appliance.

The day had started early with some DIY to get the old machine out and to one side, then the cooker out and ready for Tony. After a day out yesterday there was the inevitable tide of email to sort and my notes from yesterday to review and make a start on.

Tony appeared, true to his word, to check the cooker, remove the element and find me a new one and then fit it. At last a whole range of meals which don’t need to be cooked in a pan, wok or grilled open up before me.

At lunchtime the new washing machine arrives and the old one leaves. The whole process is done quicker than Martin and me moving the fridge freezer into the house.

My evening calls to the States all done I remove all the packing, connect up the pipes and make a start on catching up with the washing.

It’s too late to call Martin so I settle down to watch TV and that is when I hear the water. When I walk into the kitchen I see it. The pipe which connect the new waste pipe to the drain has split. In a final act of revenge the Appliance Gods have won.